The outline of free hug from Maysa writting

Free Hug Campaign

In the first scene, some people didn’t want to give hug for a man, a there are some of those who were recorded with his phone, even some people didn’t care at him. But he did not give up until he found an older woman who would hold her. After that, three woman younger than the first woman was coming at a man from another side in another time. They gave him a free hug. The fourth person is the first men who want to hug him. Next is a girl again. Next a man met with a pair friendship and offered to hold a paper that says "FREE HUGS", and they are agreed to help a man. Some people want to hug them. And then, the girl wants to offer herself in that place. Finally everybody hugs with other guy with their style. When a man tried to invited the policeman to hug him, but he refused and did not agree with the campaign which is held by a man who uses the red suit. Although, the police forbade him but he didn’t give up or that campaign. He collected signatures of people who agree with his activities with used make the petition until it reaches the target in order to collect 10,000 supporters of campaign "free hugs". And in the end, the police gave permission to the man they are even willing to embrace the campaign supporters. The main point in this paragraph is the people have forgotten the tradition of giving someone a hug. Though the hug was something free, but people rarely use it to strengthen a person.

Topic sentence                            :  (The main point in this paragraph is the people have forgotten the tradition of giving someone a hug.)

1.      Major supporting sentence 1   : Some people didn’t want to give hug for a man.

Minor supporting sentence 1   : Some of those who were recorded with his phone.

Minor supporting sentence 2   : Some people didn’t care at him.

2.      Major supporting sentence 2   : They gave him a free hug.

Minor supporting sentence 1   : He found an older woman who would hold her.

Minor supporting sentence 2    : man met with a pair friendship and offered to hold a paper that says "FREE HUGS".

Minor supporting sentence 3   : Some people want to hug them.

3.      Major supporting sentence 3   : A man tried to invited the policeman to hug him.

Minor supporting sentence 1    : He refused and did not agree with the campaign.

Minor Supporting sentence 2 : He collected signatures of people who agree with his activities with used make the petition until it reaches the target in order to collect 10,000 supporters of campaign "free hugs” 
Minor supporting sentences 3 : the police gave permission to the man they are even willing to embrace the campaign supporters.

Concluding sentences                 : Though the hug was something free, but people rarely use it to strengthen a person.

After I read your post, I think it’s good. At the beginning you tell the process of free hug in detail, one by one.  You already use the time signal on your paragraph. I think you should carefully to check your sentences. I found ‘’to invited’’ that should be ‘’to invite’’. and I think some of your sentences are too long. I suggest you, maybe you should define your long sentence become two or three sentences. Thank you.